THE LAST NOTE ON A TABLE! Written By Francesca N O'Keefe@

Life is full of U-turns don't look at me that way. ''I'' you dare to get scared of me! My hands are clean my chin is up towards you. If I tumbled down time to time, it's just because I'm human! So Bare with me! I am the one who'd carry you on her back without a sigh! Silenced! But will come to that moment:))) Yes ''I'' only carry ''I'' one life. I carry one life. One heart. No doubts of past days. Have loved so many times. I failed so many times. I fail down so many times. My knees are cut. I stood up again and again. I've met so many soul butchers, tried to cut down my life tree. I bared with life. I bared with loneliness. I bared with lies and cheat. I bared with souls who had no love in their hearts. As the years passed I figured man's heart made of wood. Women's heart made of glass. And when the glass is broken, unmendable. Women needs more miracle. When she cries it's from the heart. She cries screaming. Different part of the women feels the same way. She holds on to her dream with a boat made of paper and she sails her dreams out to unknown. Thank God I can cry. Thank God I can breathe. And protest these wild comings and goings. True color is not shown yet. Prepare your hearts I will come in to your hearts without giving you notice. I'm wet just rain showered over my head. Don't set your hopes high I am only mom's miracle. Only she tries to protect her only daughter. Her shadow warms my soul. Whenever she cries I get angry. I say why you cry mom? She says I'm so happy that's why. Just like that happiness is rhetorical question of the matter. There is nothing left before you or you after you. Time to time I think of you. Time to time I shed a tear out of the blue. Time to time I revoke myself. Time to time I go and comeback. What can you do more when a heart beats with love but without the loved one? Life is full of U-Turns. You dumped me to this ocean. You left me behind. If I cry shout, yell, scream. It's all because I'm happy. We cover so many things with tears. So I lock myself in to my room. I burried my past in to your grave. While giving up on love since you have disappear...I look at my dog Toffee's forehead, there is a big heart shape on her forehead. She lays by my side. Put all of your hopes ,dreams and memories to one suitcase. Because that is the only thing you will take it with you to end of your journey. Before you was the same after you. Empty......Like it said The last note on a table.....!

LA ÚLTIMA CARTA SOBRE LA MESA written by Francesca N O’Keefe- Translated by Claudia Molina Basteris

La vida está llena de giros, no me mires así. ”Mi Yo” !osas tener miedo de mi! Mis manos están limpias, mi barbilla levantada hacia ti. Si he caído de vez en vez, es debido a que soy ¡simplemente humana! Así que lidia conmigo. Yo soy la que te cargaría en mi espalda sin siquiera suspirar. ¡En silencio! Y llegará ese momento:))) Si ”Yo” solo cargo a ”Mi” una vida. Yo cargo una vida. Un corazón. Sin dudas de los días pasados. He amado tantas veces. He fracasado tantas veces. He caído tantas veces. Mis rodillas están lastimadas. Y yo me he levantado una y otra vez. He conocido a tantos carniceros del alma, trate de cortar el árbol de mi vida. Sobrelleve la vida, sobrelleve la soledad. Sobrelleve las mentiras y el engaño. Yo lidie con almas que carecían de amor en sus corazones. Con el paso de los años entendí que el corazón del hombre está hecho de madera. El de la mujer de cristal. Y cuando el cristal se rompe, irreparable. La mujer necesita más el milagro. Cuando ella llora, llora del corazón. Ella llora gritando. Diferentes partes de la mujer sienten de esta misma manera. Ella se aferra a su sueño con un barco hecho de papel y navega con sus sueños hacia lo desconocido. Gracias a Dios que puedo llorar. Gracias a Dios que puedo respirar, y poder protestar de estas locas idas y venidas. El verdadero color no ha aparecido aún. Preparen sus corazones. Yo llegaré a sus corazones sin previo aviso. Estoy mojada, la lluvia mojo mi cabeza. No pongan sus esperanzas en alto, Yo solo soy el milagro de mi mamá. Tan sólo ella trata de proteger a su hija única. Su sombra calienta mi alma. Cuando ella llora, yo me enojo, yo le pregunto ¿Mamá por qué lloras? Ella contesta estoy muy contenta, ese es el motivo. Así como esa felicidad es la pregunta retorica del asunto. No quedo nada antes de ti o después de ti. De vez en cuando pienso en ti. De vez en cuando lloro una lágrima así de la nada. De vez en cuando me retracto. De vez en cuando voy y regreso. ¿Qué mas puedes hacer cuando un corazón late con amor, pero sin el amado? la vida está llena de giros. Tú me arrojaste a este océano. Tú me dejaste atrás. Si lloro fuerte, chillo, grito. Es porque mesiento contenta. Cubrimos tantas cosas con nuestras lágrimas. Así que me encierro en mi cuarto. Enterré mi pasado en tu tumba. Y mientras me doy por vencida ya que tú has desaparecido…yo veo la frente de mi perro Toffee, tiene una imagen en forma de un corazón. Ella se acuesta junto a mí. Pon todas tus ilusiones, sueños y memorias en una maleta. Porque eso es lo único que te llevaras contigo al final del camino. Antes de ti, era lo mismo, después de ti lo mismo. Vacio…como dice La última carta sobre la mesa…..!

La dernière note sur une table …..! Written By Francesca Nina O’Keefe-Translated by Bob Ore

La vie est pleine de tours et de détours ! Ne me regarde pas comme ça ! “Je” vous osez avoir peur de moi!? Mes mains sont propres, mon menton est avancé vers vous. Si je dégringole de temps en temps, c’est juste parce que je suis humaine! Sois patient avec moi! Je suis celle qui va te porter sur son dos, sans un soupir! Sans un mot! Sans une parole ! Mais nous viendrons à ce moment-là :))) Oui “Moi ” je peux seulement porter «Je» le temps d’une vie. Je porte une vie. Un cœur. Plus les doute de ces derniers jours. J’ai aimé tant de fois. J’ai échoué tant de fois. Je suis tombée tant de fois. Mes genoux sont coupés. Je me suis levé encore et encore. J’ai rencontré tellement de bouchers de l’âme qui ont essayé de réduire mon arbre de vie. Je me suis mise à nu devant la vie, à nu avec la solitude. J’ai mis à nu le mensonge et la triche. J’ai mis à nu les âmes qui n’avaient pas l’amour dans leur cœur. Au fil des années j’ai pensé que le cœur de l’homme était fait de bois, celui des femmes en verre. Et quand le verre est cassé, il est irréparable. Les Femmes ont besoin de plus de miracles. Quand elles pleurent, c’est du fond du cœur. Elles pleurent en hurlant. Les différentes parties de la femme ressentent la même chose. Elle s’accroche à son rêve avec un bateau en papier et elle navigue sur ses rêves vers des terres inconnues. Dieu merci, je peux pleurer. Dieu merci, je peux respirer. Et protester contre ces allées et venues sauvages. La vraie couleur n’est pas encore montrée. Préparez vos cœurs car je viendrais dans vos cœurs sans vous en aviser. Je suis humide, arrosé par une douce douche de pluie au-dessus de ma tête. Ne placez pas vos espoirs démesurément, je ne suis que le miracle de ma mère. Elle n’essaie que de protéger sa fille unique. Son ombre réchauffe mon âme. Chaque fois qu’elle pleure, je me fâche. Je lui dis : Pourquoi tu pleures maman? Elle me répond je suis heureuse, voila pourquoi ! Juste comme le bonheur est une question rhétorique. Il ne reste rien devant vous ou après vous. De temps en temps je pense à toi. De temps en temps je verse une larme à l’improviste. De temps en temps je me révoque moi-même. De temps en temps je vais et je reviens. Que pouvez-vous faire de plus lorsque le cœur bat d’amour, mais sans être aimé en retour? La vie est pleine de tours et de détours. Tu m’as jeté en plein dans cet océan. Tu m’as laissé pour compte. Si je pleure si je crie je hurle c’est seulement parce que je suis heureuse. Nous couvrons beaucoup de choses avec nos larmes. Alors je m’enferme dans ma chambre. J’enterre mon passé dans ta tombe. J’ai laisse tomber l’amour, puisque tu as disparu … Je regarde le large front de Toffee mon chien. Il a dessus la forme d’un large cœur. Mettez tous vos espoirs, vos rêves et vos souvenirs dans une valise. Parce que c’est la seule chose que vous allez emporter avec vous à la fin de votre voyage. Avant vous est la même chose qu’après vous. Vider …… Comme il est dit : La dernière note sur une table …..!

THE LAST NOTE ON A TABLE! Written By Francesca N O'Keefe@ by Francesca Nina O'Keefe (Notes) on Friday, March 29, 2013 at 8:17am

Life is full of U-turns don't look at me that way. ''I'' you dare to get scared of me! My hands are clean my chin is up towards you. If I tumbled down time to time, it's just because I'm human! So Bare with me! I am the one who'd carry you on her back without a sigh! Silenced! But will come to that moment:))) Yes ''I'' only carry ''I'' one life. I carry one life. One heart. No doubts of past days. Have loved so many times. I failed so many times. I fail down so many times. My knees are cut. I stood up again and again. I've met so many butcher souls tried to cut down my life tree. I bared with life. I bared with loneliness. I bared with lies and cheat. I bared with souls who had no love in their hearts. As the years passed I figured man's heart made of wood. Women's heart made of glass. And when the glass is broken, unbendable. Women needs more miracle. When she cries it's from the heart. She cries screaming. Different part of the women feels the same way. She holds on to her dream with a boat made of paper and she sails her dreams out to unknown. Thank God I can cry. Thank God I can breathe. And protest these wild comings and goings. True color is not shown yet. Prepare your hearts I will come in to your hearts without giving you notice. I'm wet just rain showered over my head. Don't set your hopes high I am only mom's miracle. Only she tries to protect her only daughter. Her shadow warms my soul. Whenever she cries I get angry. I say why you cry mom? She says I'm so happy that's why. Just like that happiness is rhetorical question of the matter. There is nothing left before you or you after you. Time to time I think of you. Time to time I shed a tear out of the blue. Time to time I revoke myself. Time to time I go and comeback. What can you do more when a heart beats with love but without the loved one? Life is full of U-Turns. You dumped me to this ocean. You left me behind. If I cry shout, yell, scream. It's all because I'm happy. We cover so many things with tears. So I lock myself in to my room. I burry my past. While giving up on love since you have disappear...I look at my dog Toffee's forehead, there is a big heart shape on her forehead. She lays by my side. Put all of your hopes ,dreams and memories to one suitcase. Because that is the only thing you will take it with you to end of your journey. Before you was the same after you. Empty......Like it said The last note on a table.....!

WAITING FOR GODHO! written by Francesca N O'Keefe

Who am I to tell someone to apologize or when to apologize? We all make mistakes right? And we all know how to apologize? However the process of forgiving takes a while. Is forgetting is forgiving? How many things we can forgive or forget? I think if someone doesn’t repeat the same mistake they've still got a chance to be forgiven.
11 am in the morning in Istanbul. I had a guest, which was a cat in my home, name Pasha. I am like a real writer now. Typing and a cat landed by my side from nowhere? I am scared the cat might jump out of the windows. So windows are closed. Funny but it had happen to the rabbit that I bought for a friend. It jumped out of a balcony just like that. So I am scared. I am scared of what will or would happen before I can go on.
No more birds chirping nor seagulls flying above my head. I miss going away. There will be a moment I will leave again. It is the nature of my life.
I am apologizing from my life. It sucks at the moment. Still I can’t jump off the balcony like my rabbit. Thinking like her; I will land safely on the ground.
There is this unbearable missing towards something. I want to take a boat trip and just fish for 1 month. Only action I want to take is in the name of thinking is playing chess against myself.
The thing you call miracle, doesn't happen with one person maybe. These warm days will pass. These glory of living will give me my present of my life.
I was watching this singer singing in a colosseum then another performer. Full of people listening one song and then waiting for one glimbs of smile or a laughter.
Then I have noticed. Someone took away from me my dreams from me while I was in my sleep. Then it reminded me the reason of living. A man without a dream is no one. Am I no one? Yes maybe I've lost my dreams. So I live like no one. But here again a little deep note to my God and to your God. May God give us back all of our dreams. May we all live our dreams. And live a life dream come true. Other wise no reason to hang on to something it doesn't belong to you.
Never mind me today. Life has always it's own weight when you share what you have and when you dream.
So I am waiting for my Godho to bring me back my dreams....

In love, Las Vegas Written By Francesca Nina O'Keefe

I can’t breathe until you’re resting with me. It always feels like you’re resting here with me. So much harmony is around you while I live. I don’t even want to move at times. It feels like it’ll change my memory….
Is whatever happens in Las Vegas become like Lost in Vegas? No, I do know what I want, I just won’t go, I can’t hide, and I can’t leave…
Never let me go! Love me more and more!
I am lost in your wilderness.
Since I left you I grow. I became a woman of my own,
After you lost me, maybe there is a sunset blvd. in our life that we belong to Red so Red bar our drink is whisky…
I am f……ng off these days with others.
Maybe one day you can be like me and hold my hand to bungee jump out of our world.
So we can run away for good….
Until we wake up on one pillow. Until we die.
I want to dream of that moment. Until the last day of my life, without any regret…
If god created me for you, you’ll find your way to find me wherever I am…
Loving you is the best thing I can do….
Leaving you is, Just for you to come back (return) to me…
I wish you understand me and care and value me as much as I value and care for you. But, such as life.

UNDER THE TUSCAN SUN written by Francesca Nina O'Keefe

Once I was on a plane and traveling . A lady sat by me. We talked for a while and she read some of my writings. She told me to watch "under the Tuscan sun". And she told me there is a character called "Francesca" just like me. Strangely enough I haven’t watch the movie for 2 years. Two years later I was having one of my lazy Sundays. I sat, turn on the movie. As soon as I heard "Francesca" I said what the heck maybe there this magic message from the universe “The Secret” Yes I watch that too. It works funky with me. But this time it was strange. Now I live very close to the wedding ballroom. So Saturdays and Sundays are too much traffic around here in Istanbul. Everybody is getting married. It’s banging in my ears. I don’t want to get married. But it makes me feel I should want that. What kind of man can handle me? For sure a rare breed! Someone with no complex! Whom not competing with others or me.

Anyways. In the movie , This Francesca went to Tuscany bought a house. In the house she wanted to have a family, wedding and a child.

At first her friend who was pregnant came, had the baby she watched, and then she had a young worker who fell in love with a rich girl. They got married in her home.

She watched all of her friends. Then she met this handsome Italian romantic guy. He swept her off her feet with nice words. She was staying with her ways. She went out and changed her black dress to white dress. He liked white. He went to the other town she followed him and her heart. Ups. The guy was with another Italian chick. She came back her home. Broke things and cried.

And at the wedding party of her emplyee She noticed a thing. There was a wedding in the house and a family. Future. She lay on the couch content. And then this man came in to her life out of the blue. Picked a ladybug from her arm. And she began a new life….

Can we do this? For every woman can be a man the way they want? I think he’s out there in the universe.

But remember the secret….

1- Don’t settle less or more! Settle for what you looking for.

2- Be available and get rid of the old one. The one makes you unhappy lies to you but comes back to you with a charm. And you maybe are accepting him back. Say no this time. Start fresh.

3- If a man tells you ; you’re not in his criteria or he doesn’t like to get up watch you putting a make up on; He’s not for you, He’s probably in love with an image of you rather then you .I repeat again you deserve better.

One day I feel you’ll find that man maybe a ladybug will bring it you. He will care for who you are. Not what can you do for him. He will just be there and enjoy watching you under the Tuscan sun waking up. Walking and maybe getting old gracefully on a chair sitting side by side and enjoying nice glass of wine over the sunset with a breeze of life.